Autumn Anniversaries

This week is an important one to me. My church wedding anniversary is on October 6th and my Canadian wedding anniversary is today on the 12th.

Most years I remember our anniversaries on the blog by celebrating some aspect of my relationship or memories but this year it feels as if over half of the country is helping us celebrate.

In fact the article I linked to above is not up to date, Idaho and North Carolina started marriages yesterday. In total ten states. Ten! Ten more states where same sex couples can get married and it all happened this week. 

When my wife asked me if I wanted anything for our anniversary this year I told her not to bother. It's been a wonderful week and I feel so blessed. I hope the joy keeps going out in ever-widening circles.

Sixth on the Sixth

Our sixth wedding anniversary!

Wow that went by so quickly.

I can remember 10-6-2007,  the humidity and heat and rush and all the love and support so well.  I am so grateful for these memories but also happy that today will be of a much lower stress and task level.

It's a crisp, sunny-for-now, typical autumn day.  My sweet wife has spent most of the weekend sick in bed, we have missed concerts, parties and now we will be staying in for our anniversary.  I will pick up some Indian take out. I am not sick in the same way but I don't feel normal either so it is good to not have to push it. My new dress will have to wait to be taken out.

It is wonderful to remember our first wedding day and be happy with all the extras there are to celebrate this year. Low key is a really nice change.

Five years ago today

Five years ago today I woke up and I was engaged to be married. Shortly afterwards I started this blog. I appreciated the double meaning of 'engaged' in my life at that time.

I look back over the past five years with a smile on my face, they have been good, changeful years and I am so happy that I do not have to plan another wedding any time soon. [unless it's that magic third one]

Today I read of the death of Jamesetta Hawkins, who most people know as Etta James. Bless her heart. Our first wedding song was At Last, chosen in part because of how wonderful Etta James sounds when she sings it. Our singer that night did a fabulous job with it, she too has an earthy powerful voice.

It always made me giggle a bit when we did something typical almost iconic for our wedding and this was no exception. It's a very happy memory. I am grateful for that.

the 'how can I be so lucky' anniversary

Sometimes I have to pinch myself, I can't believe I am so lucky. I have a dear, dear friend and this is the anniversary of the day we met. [this does not mean I don't appreciate all my other wonderful friends of course!]

I am going to guess that we all have pivotal people in our lives. The kind of people who had/have a profound effect on us. She is one of those people for me. Still. I truly don't know who I would be without her. I do know that before I met her I felt her absence in my life. I longed for my friend.

True we sometimes [still!] after all these years misunderstand each other, thank goodness we can laugh about it now. Apparently we are both human and all. But the benefit of having the 'superest' of Virgos in your life cannot be underestimated. Like health, you cannot buy friendship in a store, it is a gift. Sometimes, if you are lucky. During a week where people are getting laid off right and left at my company it is good to know this--I am truly fortunate in friends.

This year I am in snowy MN with my friend and we can celebrate it together. I can toast her in person and with my hand over my heart as I bow, I turn my face towards her in gladness, in gratitude.

I hope everyone can find something to celebrate this Wednesday.

The Third Second One

Another October is rapidly passing and that means it's time for us to celebrate our Canadian wedding anniversary.

Although we have many loving thoughts of our first wedding with our family and friends which I believe is ever fixed in people's minds by the heat wave that year. [Though it sounds like some have fond memories of the cake and polenta entree as well, both excellent.]

Our Canadian wedding is special for other reasons. Getting married outside in a garden, the ease of the legal side, the beauty of a whole country acknowledging our right to marry who we love. The incredible kindness of strangers. All wonderful.

We both had to work all day so we went out to celebrate with dinner. Fittingly we used a gift card we got as a wedding present for Salut. The celebration with my wife was lovely. The wine, a white bordeaux, was delicious. The duck confit was nice but extremely salty as was the bread. The ham and eggs on my croque madame just so so, I don't think they source local high quality pork. They are famous for their pomme frites, but again, I have had better. Also the food sat very heavily on both our digestions. Oh well. My wife really did enjoy her hangar steak however and noted that she enjoyed coming there for lunch for the better prices.

I don't really want to dis them, there wasn't anything really horrible but it just wasn't my thing in general. In fact half of their menu is steaks and hamburgers. Perhaps they are trying to be more american/kid friendly? Their desserts, which we did not try, were huge.

With so many favorite places to eat and so many I want to try I won't be heading back to Salut's any time quickly. But for some people it's probably the perfect mix of accessible french/american food. The restaurant was crowded for a Tuesday. For the same price point I would rather try here next time.

Still it was a lovely time to celebrate.

third first one

I can hardly believe that our third wedding anniversary is here. In some ways it went so fast and in some ways it seems like it was just yesterday all the family was in town.

We are having a brilliant week with the perfect autumn weather we were hoping for back in 2007. The woods are stunning with a carpet of gold stretching out under the brilliant trees. The sky and the lake are incredible shades of blue.

I look around at the beauty and feel luckier than ever. My wife is someone I really do enjoy more and more most days. I feel rested and full and grateful for our health and lives in general. I am so happy we got married 3 years ago and that so many of you were around to witness or hear about it. [If you weren't there is always the archives]

I hope that everyone out there has something to be happy about today.

away with shoulds -- first anniversary

I gave myself a gift last night. I had a block of time to myself and I spent several hours enjoying past posts on Havi Brooks blog. It was lovely and restorative and fun. This is the woman who inspired me to blog 100+ times in 2009 because she showed me a path towards freedom and away from shoulds.

As I was reveling in her words, deep in the archives of October 2009, I heard a inner voice 'hey when was it exactly that you started blogging again last year?' I would have guessed it was the 13th or 9th, but thanks to archives no one has to depend on my memory. It was January 3rd a year ago today.

I feel a bit teary when I think [again] about how a stranger can help a person [or many] by accident or design to a gift. I had a lot of examples of it this year. They give me hope that life can be good. This blog has been a doorway for me into a more spacious me with more room for fun. That's feeling pretty huge. And it's been basically guilt-free!

As for Havi since she is on an email sabbatical, I may just drop her a snail mail of thanks, because I think she rocks and I want to let people hear good things when I can. Here is one of the sparkley rocks I picked up in her blog archive last night. I want to do this the next time I feel stuck [which may be right now...]

"I am going to buy flowers. And by the time they wilt and lose their petals, things will be better. Or at least different. But I hope better." Andreas via Havi Brooks

drive by happy anniversary

It was a beautiful sunny day in CA. Much holiday baking was done. Not much writing has been done yet today but I have to say happy anniversary to a dear, dear friend.

My chief bridal ninja, my spiritual twin and someone who actually remembers me from my teens. A exceptional musician, a talented artist and a mistress of all things Virgo.

I can't even imagine what my life would be like without her presence. Sometimes when I look at the love in my life I can't comprehend I how got this lucky. I am truly grateful for all of it.

And today I lift a freshly baked cookie to her in snowy MN with love. Here's to our next tattoo.

the second second one

Last week I went on a bit about my sweetie, which I feel is all but expected when celebrating an anniversary. Today is the second anniversary of our second wedding. On October 12, in Victoria BC, Canada we were married in a lovely garden by a public officiant who just happened to be a Unitarian minister.

It's hard for me to describe what a big deal this was. If you currently live in a country where you have always had the right to marry the person you love you may not get it. We went to the government 'stat' building and bought a license, we have a wedding license from the province of British Columbia, we are just plain old married up in Canada. It is just amazing to be treated normally sometimes. I remember it so lovingly. How the B&B owners attended. How our amazing witnesses, 'friends of friends', came with flowers and gifts to celebrate with 2 strangers getting married in their country. How the sun shown in the garden. How simple it was. How my wife looked signing the doument. How we had the most basic ceremony words at this wedding:

"In the presence of these witnesses I now take you to be my wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse,for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, in sorrow or in joy, to love and to cherish as long as we both shall live."

I still cry thinking about it. It does make a difference.

I am full of gratitude that I got to experience this and I pray that in my lifetime I will have a third wedding in my own country where I am a tax paying citizen. *sigh*

the second first one

Yesterday was our second anniversary of our first wedding.
In so many ways these 2 years have whizzed by. It seems a bit odd to think 'here we go onto year 3'. But odd in the best way. My parents sent the sweetest card. I feel so lucky for their support.

We both worked during the day so we had BLTs at home and went to the Guthrie for rush tickets and saw The Importance of Being Ernest. It was a very fun evening, and it's a delight to see a classic at the Guthrie, but mostly it's wonderful being married to this amazing woman.

The woman I married is an incredibly kind, generous, brilliant person. I have always been in awe of her brain, of her amazing creativity. I can't believe I married a physicist! I feel blessed that we joined our lives together. I believe that we truly do support each other in ways that nurture strength and change and insight. Mostly I feel lucky.

I truly hope that my sweetheart's next year will be made smooth and effortless.

Mall shock

It's really cold again. The high yesterday was +1 F and it was hard to get moving. I had a reason to go to the mall and I thought I could combine the shopping with several circuits around the mall for exercise.

It was so crowded. Since retail buying is supposed to be down I am assuming most people were there to find a place to get out of the weather. I completely understand that. After 2 circuits and some quick shopping I was so surfeited with people I was ready to retch. These are the times that remind me that in truth I am an introvert.

Before I went slowly insane I did finally buy a date book for 2009. I couldn't find a date book I really liked but it when things are 75% off it's pretty easy for me to settle for $4.00.

I also went to Williams-Sonoma where I have gift cards up the whazoo. Some are left over from my bridal shower. I actually had a few items I wanted and needed. A tart pan, a pastry brush and pastry scraper. [where did my first pastry scraper go?] I also bought a melon baller, something I never planned on owning until I read weeks ago how Deb at smittenkitchen uses hers to remove cores from apple halves. I hate coring apples, I had a gift card so ... I hope it works. [is the term 'core apples' or 'de-core apples'? I am drawing a blank]

This means apple tart and homemade cinnamon ice cream for dessert at this week's dinner party is a go. Beef Burgundy with potatoes or noodles. Roasted beet salad and probably something on crostini for starters.

Other notable events yesterday; I got pictures via email of our new great niece. She is adorable with such dark eyes for such a new baby. Now I want to actually post a picture and I can't get it to work.

Also Carolyn and I went to the Corner Table to celebrate the day we met 5 years ago. If you live in the area, save up and treat yourself some special occasion. It's a small chef owned place so get reservations.

The meal was fabulous. The gnocchi is sublime. The best I have had outside of Italy. It is so light I expect it to float off of the plate. The spinach salad special with breast of duck shavings yummy. Her fettucine carbonara special and my lamb ragout were wonderful for a freezing cold winter night and went great with my glass of Boroli. Carolyn loved her chocolate bread pudding, and they happily accommodated her 'no alcohol' request and replaced the bourbon creme anglais with a cream cheese sauce she said was great. My parsnip honey cake was so luscious and not too sweet for this no sugar eater. I realize I could go on and on about this meal, but I will stop now. And now I am hungry just from writing the above.

Sounds like next weekend will be a bit warmer which means cross country skiing. I look forward to that. ECD tonight, I will brave the cold.