taking the shine

It was indeed a weird week last week. I had really funny adorable post rattling in my head and then I was wiped out by a migraine. I don't get migraines very often nowadays, perhaps twice a year, but when I do whoa .

As I was pulling out from a bad one [made worse by the sauna, note to self 'do not sauna when you have a migraine'] I was going to put myself in bed for a little nap, hopefully to speed the healing. Oh wait, I thought, must feed kitty first so I won't be nagged while trying to heal.

That was when it happened, I bent over in the dark closet to get the food and smacked my face into the vacuum handle I didn't see. Thereby getting my first shiner. There was much profanity, those who only know me through this blog may not realize what a swearer I am, and when faced with that kind of pain I really let loose. I then stumbled to the couch, clutching an ice pack, held it on my face and cried for 15 minutes. I didn't even really realize I was crying.

Ok, I had no idea that black eyes hurt that much. wow. How do people fight or box and even risk that kind of pain. Even though the excruciating bit was done in an hour, it throbbed for a day then hurt for several more, and now near a week later it is still tender to touch. And yes, it is totally weird to be able to see your own cheek without looking into a mirror.

And weirdly I even felt shame about it, like people would be assuming that I had been in a fight or been abused or something. It was a new experience I wouldn't have minded missing though I certainly have empathy for all those with black eyes now. Which is probably handy from a 'growing as a person' perspective.
Should I be seeing a moral in here about not taking care of your cat before yourself or something...

cold so soup

The late November weather continues. Of course October is barely half over but I survive. I don't like to complain about the cold too much, since usually I don't mind it all that much, after all I do choose to live here in Minnesota. I feel silly complaining about cold here, like complaining about rain when you choose to live in Seattle. But seeing it snow again this morning as I drove to work was...a downer. I love autumn and I would really love it if the weather would go back to average so that I could enjoy autumn.

In the meantime my best response to the weather is soup. There was a ham bone waiting so it's making yummy broth right now and the beans are soaking. Tomorrow I'll take the fat off the top of the chilled broth and make white bean soup. I have a plethora of veggies to choose from so who knows what will go into it. Definitely kale since I have bags of it and leeks and who knows--soup adventures!

The supporting reason for my beginning this soup...I can step into my kitchen again, the new floor is grouted. Rosie was adorable the first time she picked her way daintily across the new floor, seeing a rottweiler be light-footed is not something you see every day. The floor is still a work in process though absolutely gorgeous. Although we sealed the slate first it did absorb some of the grout, which we have to get off the tiles before the second coat of sealer goes on. And of course the grout needs to be sealed as well. But still big progress.

Now to mull over paint colours for the walls. Stay warm.

jumble in my head

There are all kind of things that I could blog about today. I am really having a hard time narrowing it down so instead, brain blog dump.

-This week we got 2.5 inches of snow. It was all way too early for us all. My garden is basically done for the year and the CSA ends this week as well. It's been quite the veggie ride this summer. And I think I would do it again.
-Our red and yellow check 12x12 laminate tile kitchen floor has bit the dust. The tiles were just crumbling to bits every time it was washed, and finally we admitted we either had to put down a new floor or walk around on plywood for awhile. Since my super handy bil is in town and willing to do most of the work getting a new floor down, that is what we have been doing. We went with the 16x16 slate tiles from home depot at 1.77 a square foot. The grouting is today and the floor looks stunning. And really the project is happening quite quickly. But I feel like I have been spending every moment with other people and my introvert self is reeling. I desperately need some quiet time and I feel stupid about getting it.
-I am in the second week of a resiliency program which does not have link. If you have ever read "the Chemistry of Joy" then you'll have an idea of what the program consists. This is run by the guy who wrote that book and is quite cool and hard and amazing and overwhelming all at the same time. Not sure how I will feel at the end. Sometimes I do not feel very hopeful. And sometimes I feel out of place since I have never even been on anti-depressant medication.
-the weather is changing [even earlier than usual] and I have no idea how I will get more exercise in my life, especially given that my downstairs is torn up with the floor remodel. And we are going to paint the kitchen as well since the old yellow won't go with the slate floor and it hasn't been done in 10+ years and really needs it.
-if I still sound overwhelmed I am. It seems to be the theme for the year.
-in my intake for the program it was recommended I go on Rhodiola. It's been about a month now and I think it's helping. [which I guess is good but I don't know if doing more is the optimal result] This is probably why I was able to consider tackling the kitchen problem at all and why ...
-we are having a Samhain [Halloween] party at the end of the month. If you know us and you live in the area and you didn't get an invitation it was pure accident. We are inviting everyone. I am really looking forward to a fun, informal get together with whoever can drop by. My first Halloween party since my junior year in high school!
-the cottage is taking up some attention. a new furnace really needs to be installed to deal with our very cold [and did I mention early] winters. Hopefully it will work out and soon.

So there it is a collage of my current life. Perhaps there will be more focus coming out of all of this soon. I hope everyone is as warm as they need to be right now.

the second second one

Last week I went on a bit about my sweetie, which I feel is all but expected when celebrating an anniversary. Today is the second anniversary of our second wedding. On October 12, in Victoria BC, Canada we were married in a lovely garden by a public officiant who just happened to be a Unitarian minister.

It's hard for me to describe what a big deal this was. If you currently live in a country where you have always had the right to marry the person you love you may not get it. We went to the government 'stat' building and bought a license, we have a wedding license from the province of British Columbia, we are just plain old married up in Canada. It is just amazing to be treated normally sometimes. I remember it so lovingly. How the B&B owners attended. How our amazing witnesses, 'friends of friends', came with flowers and gifts to celebrate with 2 strangers getting married in their country. How the sun shown in the garden. How simple it was. How my wife looked signing the doument. How we had the most basic ceremony words at this wedding:

"In the presence of these witnesses I now take you to be my wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse,for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, in sorrow or in joy, to love and to cherish as long as we both shall live."

I still cry thinking about it. It does make a difference.

I am full of gratitude that I got to experience this and I pray that in my lifetime I will have a third wedding in my own country where I am a tax paying citizen. *sigh*

the second first one

Yesterday was our second anniversary of our first wedding.
In so many ways these 2 years have whizzed by. It seems a bit odd to think 'here we go onto year 3'. But odd in the best way. My parents sent the sweetest card. I feel so lucky for their support.

We both worked during the day so we had BLTs at home and went to the Guthrie for rush tickets and saw The Importance of Being Ernest. It was a very fun evening, and it's a delight to see a classic at the Guthrie, but mostly it's wonderful being married to this amazing woman.

The woman I married is an incredibly kind, generous, brilliant person. I have always been in awe of her brain, of her amazing creativity. I can't believe I married a physicist! I feel blessed that we joined our lives together. I believe that we truly do support each other in ways that nurture strength and change and insight. Mostly I feel lucky.

I truly hope that my sweetheart's next year will be made smooth and effortless.