lay offs

So no updated word count today, it's been a very tense, tight 24 hours or so. Hopefully I will be able to write later this evening.

My company gave notice to many people of massive lay offs today. The end date is January 29. Needless to say it has been surreal. It's like someone has died, and it is so hard to know what to say to these people. I just want to wail, but that almost seems insulting here I still have my job for now.
Survival guilt has its own set of discomforts. I will be losing 3 team mates by the end of January and 2 more in June. I have no idea what is going to happen, how the work will all get done.

Not to be looking into the future too much but this is such a stressful time of year and to have this swirling all around. wow. I feel compassionate, lucky, empathetic, scared, grateful and stunned.
Everyone over 19 realizes that life isn't fair, but it doesn't make it suck any less sometimes.